So i'm sitting here thinking, and adding up dates. I realized that the last day I saw you, was July 2nd, 2006. That's 9 months from TOMORROW! That's a long time. That's a very long time, to hold up, without you there. I took you for granted, of the time i had with you. I didn't make
every moment I had with you count. I wasted the time I had, not knowing it was the only time i had. That time of my life, that I spent with you, i didn't realize how much it meant to me, how close it was, until i realized that i wasn't going to be spending my life like that. The day I found out you were moving, was the day I lost my mind. Crying for days after days. As I sit here with tears streaming down my face, I just want you to know, that no matter where our lives are, where our bodies are, how far apart we are on earth, i'm always here for you. Just now realizing that all those wonderful memories one year from now, is gone, forever. Never coming back, is hurts. With the slideshows of the memories going through my head. We only had a year and a half together, but if you want the honest truth, that year and a half, was the best year and a half of my life. During that year and a half we went through so much. From the good times, to the bad. From sleeping outside all night, just to stare at the stars, to you having a heart surgery. You've made me believe who i was. You've made me believe, that there is a purpose for me being on this earth. You've made me realize, now that you're gone, that all time with anybody, should be kept in a safe spot in your heart. Becuase you never know when that time is up. it's like.. one of those parking lot pay tolls.. you know? once you're time is up.. you're towed away. But not knowing my time was going to be up so fast, or even at all, when I was towed away, is what hurts. No more talking on the internet for hours at a time, when we could just go outside, and talk in person. Now there is no more, "Heather can you come over for a little bit, I have something I need to tell you." No more lecturing me, about how I need to eat. No more telling me that i'm not fat. No more hugs, just becuase we're feeling blue. We can't just go on a walk around town anymore. No more having your dog bark at me, for hours at a time, because i'm standing in my front yard. There is no more looking at me funny. I can't tell you how weird your family, especially you, is. (heeh, and don't take that in a bad way). No more laughing at each other, becuase of the stupid little things we said, or did. No more laughing at me, because i'm really clumbsy. No more sleeping outside, all night long, in the middle of your yard, to look at the stars. No more sitting on your front porch, and 11:30 at night, talking about random things, like the wholes in our eyes, or shaving our toes. No more screaming outside, at 12 am, because of a spider, that we're all too scared to kill. No more crying, for the longest periods of times, because of the people we were loosing, or the things we couldn't change. There is no more, sabataging your house, with signs, of how much we love you, and how much we didn't want you to move. No more trying to unpack/unload your moving truck, with Annaliese, because we didn't want you to go. No more, "tours, of your old, empty house". No more standing out in the middle of the road, with Morgan, crying, because we didn't want you to go. No more big group hugs, filled with tears. No more laughing so hard, we have tears. No more telling me how different I am, because I don't like chocolate, or ice cream. (Heeh, and i'm female). The memories are what make that burn. All the memories we've had, and knowing they're gone. We can't make anymore. Friends are like gum, when they get old, When they turn on you. and their taste leaves, you spit them out, and get a new piece. Haha, and if you're me, you still think about them, and pray for them, that the flavor comes back. But you, Whitney, you're like a never-ending gobstopper. Your flavor never runs out. You only change for the better. And you're always there. I'm sorry for anybody who's, yet, reading this. But Whitney, I just want you to know, that I love you a lot. I know God's plan was to send you to Georgia, I know that His plan was to send me to Alabama. But just know, if you ever need anything, I'm here for you, like you were there for me. I cry myself to sleep every night, in sadness, because I miss you a bunch. Yesterday, I was talking to somebody, and somehow we got on the subject of you, and the only memory that I could get back into my head clearly, was the one of saying goodbye to you. And how you were sad, but you didn't cry, until I started crying. I didn't know how much that memory meant to me, until I was thinking about it. It made me feel that there was somebdoy out there, that cared for me. Otherwise you woudn't have ben crying, when I was. And for that I thank you.
Whitney, I love you very much. That'll never change. When I sat there, and I was thinking, before any of this moving came about, I couldn't think of anything that would tear our friendship apart. I knew it wasn't going to be over a little fight. But I never thought, never ever thought, that you would be moving. But I too, moved.
9 months, is a long time, a very very long time. My heart feels like it gets lower every day. Especially when I think of you, and all that we have been through. I love you a ton.
Heather. <3
